A Faded One (for Joe)

I opened my eyes to find
You had disappeared on purpose
After so many years
And so much of me loving you
It never really occurred to me
That you would ever leave
I thought for sure you’d always be
The sounding board for my sad echoes
The recipient of late night love letters
I still remember your dark hair between my fingertips
And the way it felt to get left by you
Over and over again
And I remember hating you
In moments in between
But you never fully left
You always welcomed me back in
I opened my eyes and you were
Suddenly gone
Every trace of you erased
And every now and then you let me know
That you might have read a poem here or there
So here’s one for you
Here’s one for ten years of idiocy
Ten years of mostly loving you
A decade of my imagination running wild
When you never even saw me.
All this time…you never really ever even saw me.

Leah Ruthe Chatterjee


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